


The life and loves of Klaus Hargreeves

by Nyx97



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Abusive Parent, Angst, Drug Use, F/M, M/M, Masturbation, Pseudo-Incest, Sex, Vietnam War, handjob, homophobia mention
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-04-24 04:16:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19165639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nyx97/pseuds/Nyx97
Summary: Here are some one-shots of Klaus, with various characters.





	1. Dave

**Author's Note:**

> Here are some one-shots of Klaus, paired with various characters. First one is Klaus and Dave, from Dave's POV. I've given Dave some backstory, and loads of angst.

Dave couldn't take his  eyes off Klaus. He was unlike anyone he had ever met before. It was almost like he came from another time, with the traces of eyeliner under his eyes, and the shirts he wore that showed off his fit belly. His easy-going flamboyance. The way he openly flirted with him and the other soldiers. It made him excited, but also afraid for him-he knew that the military was not entirely tolerant of homosexuality. Something about him made him want to protect him. Despite everything else, he could see that there was great sadness, and fear in him. 

He wondered where he was from. What his story was like. He had appeared on scene, seemingly from nowhere. Had he chosen to be a soldier? Or was he like him? He sighed, as the memories came flooding into his brain.

 

_'Why don't you let them know what you are? I don't think they are keen on having people like us in the army.' Andy said._

_The thought of coming out of the closet terrified Dave. He thought of the things his father had told about him when he learned about his sexuality, and shuddered. No, that was not going to happen._

_'No? Well, then there is always conscientious objection. And if that doesn't work out, you can fake health problems or something.'_

_Dave kept silent, as his lover stared at him for a moment. 'Davie, you're not going to enlist, are you?' You can't.'_

_Dave sighed. Andy was a fervent pacifist who was against the war. As for Dave, he did not have any strong opinions on it either way. However, he did not want to dodge the draft. He knew he'd never be able to look his father in the eye if he did that._

 

 

He was at a bar, with the other soldiers. They had only a few days before they would be sent out to the front lines, and they seemed determined to make the most of it. 

'You see that girl over there?' Oliver, one of the other soldiers said, pointing to a waitress. 'The one with nice tits? I fucked her yesterday, in the empty room behind the bar.'

The waitress was a tall, leggy blonde. Dave supposed she had 'nice tits', though it did not make a difference to him. Another memory flashed through his mind. 

 

_'Look at that girl. She has nice tits, doesn't she?'_

_The girl looked embarrassed, she had apparently heard the comment. Dave couldn't help feeling embarrassed himself, he knew that  his father was a crude man, but this girl looked no older than seventeen, Dave's age. He then realized he had made that comment for Dave's benefit, not his own._

_'Yeah, she does.' Dave said, trying to feign interest. That did not fool Dave's father. 'Dave. you'll never be a man.' he said. His words hurt more than the beating he had received when he caught him making out with another boy._

 

 

He had thought that enlisting would prove him wrong. Dave's father was a World War 2 veteran himself, after all. Dave had heard some rumours about him-that he was dishonourably discharged before he got a chance to see any combat and stuff, but he didn't think they were true. After all, his family and friends all treated him like a war hero.

He had done it. He would show his father that he did not need to fuck girls to be a man. He would.....he sighed. He had done well so far in the military, a lot better than he thought he would. However, he couldn't help being terrified by the idea of being out there on the front lines, where the prospect of death was real.

 

'So, imagine that you are in a POW camp. You have a hundred spoons, which you've used to dig a tunnel. But now all you need to do is kill the guard, for which you need a knife. That's irony, isn't it?'

Dave couldn't help feeling shocked. However, he could see that the others were enjoying his dark humour. He suddenly winked at Dave, and gave him a sultry stare. 

He was almost agonizingly sensual. Dave felt his dick get rock hard, and he had  to cross  his legs to hide his boner. He sighed. He thought of Andy, his old lover, whom he had not seen ever since he announced that he would accept the consequences of the draft without opposition. He was now so far away, and Klaus was so close. Klaus seemed to sense his arousal, and he licked his lips provocatively.  _Oh god!_

 

Dave let Klaus lead him to the empty room behind the bar. He felt his lips on his, firm, yet soft. He felt the hand on his crotch, as it undid his zipper. He was in a state of total bliss. 

 _This would get me in so much trouble_ , a voice in Dave's head said, and he ignored it. He did not care. He had spent too much of his life caring about what people thought. This one time, he was going to give in to what his heart-and his dick-wanted, which was Klaus. After all, he could die in the war, and if he did, he did not want to die with any regrets.

 

Dave looked at Klaus, who had fallen asleep on his lap. He was easily the best he ever had, but now that the sex was over, he felt a different sort of urge. He wanted to protect him. It was clear that he had a difficult sort of life, and he deserved all the love and care he could give him.  _Wait till the war is over_ , he thought.  _Then I'll show you, Klaus. I'll give you everything you want. Everything you need._

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a purely-gratuitous one-shot featuring Klaus and Diego in their late teens.

'Allison, I want to talk to you.'

Allison was surprised. Diego did not often seek out her company. 'What is it, Diego?'

'It's about you and Luther.'

'What about us?'

Diego hesitated. 'I...I want to know, don't you find it weird? I mean, I know you are not related by blood, but....'

'Fuck off, Diego.  Who the hell are you to judge our relationship?'

'I am not  _judging_ you, Allison. I just want to know how you manage to do things without feeling weird about it. I am asking because....Klaus....'

'What about Klaus?' Allison looked at Diego, and suddenly the realization struck her. 'Oh god!'

'What?'

'You want to fuck Klaus.'

Allison felt like she should have realized sooner. She had heard Klaus say all sorts of provocative stuff to Diego, but she always assumed that was just Klaus being Klaus. However, looking back she should have noticed how Diego looked at Klaus. Like he was a tasty but forbidden fruit. 

The idea was unspeakably erotic. Allison thought of Klaus undoing Diego's leather outfit. Of his plush lips  on Diego's. Of Klaus's lean, fit body on top of Diego's  buff one.

'What is it, sister?'

The word 'sister' finally brought Allison back to reality. 'The thing is, Diego...' Allison said. 'I suppose you could say that we are family, in a way. But I see us more as a metaphorical  _brotherhood_ rather than actual brothers and sisters. I mean, look at old Reginald, he's always been more of a stern headmaster than a father. We are the  _Umbrella Academy_. We haven't been raised like siblings, even adoptive siblings, things  were too complicated for that. I....I see Luther more as a classmate I grew up with rather than a brother.'

 

Allison's words helped alleviate Diego's guilt that night, when he-like he did every other night for a while-masturbated to the thought of Klaus. Klaus in his eclectic outfits, in Allison's skirts, in the nude....stripping for him, dancing, touching himself, touching him.....

There was a knock on the door. Diego hastily zipped up and opened it.

'Klaus?'

'Diego, could you help me?' He looked as hot as ever, but also worried. 'What is the matter, Klaus?

'I want you to tie me up.'

His dick reacted to Klaus's words in a way he had never experienced before. 

'I...I need to get sober. I......I don't know how Dad would react if I was unable to perform in tomorrow's test. And this is the only way I could think of.'

Diego immediately decided to put his arousal aside. He knew that Klaus was into drugs, however he did not realize how severe his drug problem was. He had no idea where he got his hands on the drugs from. However, he was willing to do whatever was possible to help him out. 

 

When Diego had decided to put his arousal aside, he had not anticipated the entire situation. Because Klaus, being the kinky fucker he was, was moaning in ecstasy on being tied up. His boner was visible through his pants, and he was palming it shamelessly. Diego was trying the hardest to ignore it, however his dick couldn't help but respond.

'Diego!' Klaus cried. 'Please help me.'

'Huh?'

'Get me off, you cruel torturer.'

'Klaus.'

'Please.' Klaus said, stretching his hand to grab Diego's and placing it on his crotch. Fuck, he was rock hard. Diego began palming him, nervous but excited. 

'Undo the zip.'

Diego followed the instructions. He had to gasp for breath at the sight of Klaus's dick. It was just like he had imagined in his fantasies. He began to stroke. 

'Faster, Diego. Klaus said. Diego picked up pace. This was the first time he had another dick in his hands, and he realized he quite liked the experience.

 

'Let me get you cleaned up.' Diego said, once Klaus climaxed. 

'Maybe if you untie me, I can do it myself. I can also reciprocate.' He gave a sultry smile and a wink that made Diego long to take him up on his offer. However, he knew that wouldn't be the right thing to do. He sighed. He would be back to masturbation.

'Alright.' Klaus said. 'If you aren't going to let me do that, you might as well get yourself off right here. Let me have the honour of watching. 

 


	3. Mia, Walter and chocolate pudding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a funny chapter, about Klaus waxing his ass with chocolate pudding.

'So last time it was Thailand, and now Amsterdam. Are you sure that those 'business meetings' are really about business?'

'I am not a fool, Mia.' Klaus said. 'But what do I care? It's not like I'm in love with him or anything.'

'Aren't you? You've been with him for three weeks. That is longer than you've ever stuck with someone.'

Klaus laughed. 'He has a nice place. Do you expect me to live in this dump forever?'

'Hey, that's my apartment you're insulting.'

'Oh I am sorry.' Klaus said, in an exaggerated gesture. 'Although you're right. It is a shit-hole. But you don't have to sleep with some rich douche to get a better life.'

'So, what do I do? Get a nine to five job?' Klaus said, mockingly. 'Yeah, and I am sure that would bring in the drug money. Yeah no, this is fine. Walter may not be the most loyal guy, but he's good enough for the time being. And oh, and his dick is pure gold. The biggest I've seen, and oh, he sure knows how to work it!'

Mia blushed a little. 'By the way, I made chocolate pudding.'

'Oh, I need to get ready now. Walter would reach in an hour.'

'Come on, you can have some pudding first.'

 

Mia couldn't help feeling intensely jealous.

Theirs was an odd sort of friendship. She and Klaus used to go to the same drug dealer, and one day, she had overdosed and passed out on the street. Klaus found her, and he took care of her. When she got better, he revealed that he had just gotten out of rehab, and did not really have a place to stay. Mia suggested he move in with her. She had a tiny run-down apartment, but it was better than nothing.

That was a beginning of an almost torturous one-sided lust-and  maybe love-story.

Mia wanted Klaus. He had beautiful green eyes, and luscious lips and an extremely fit body. He would often roam around wearing next to nothing, and Mia couldn't help but stare. Unfortunately, Klaus seemed to have zero interest in Mia. At first, she thought it was because he was gay, but later she saw him with a girl, and he told her he was actually pansexual. Still, he didn't seem into her. He seemed to see her more as a sister than anything else. 

Still, she cherished their friendship. He made her laugh, and they had  plenty of good times. While she did not know much about his past, it was apparent he'd been through a lot, as had she. They bonded over trauma, addiction and humour. 

Klaus had to shave his ass. That was what Walter liked. He couldn't help feeling excited about getting to see him again. Sure, he wasn't the nicest guy, but he could do things in bed that made his toes curl even thinking about it.

He opened the bathroom cabinet. No cream. Fuck. 

He looked at the chocolate pudding Mia had made. Could he use it to wax his ass? Could he?

 

In Klaus's defence, he was more than slightly high when he went ahead with it. However, that didn't stop Mia from walking in accidentally and screaming in shock.

'What the fuck, Klaus! My chocolate pudding!'

'I did not have anything else to wax with, okay!'

'What the fuck!'

Mia eventually saw the funny side of it, and began to laugh. The two of them laughed for a long, long time. 

'I am going to have a joint.' Mia said, eventually.

'I'd like one as well.'

'Don't you want to be at Walter's?'

'Klaus thought about it. 'Nah,' he said. He had to end things with him someday, and it might as well be that day. 

'Okay, then let's get high together. Well, high-er, in your case.

 

Mia couldn't help feeling intensely satisfied, with Klaus curled up around her. He was a sweet guy, and she did not mind that he was not into her. Being friends with him was good enough for the time being for her. She'd had plenty of lovers, but it was the first time she had a friend like this.

 

 


End file.
